WHAT started out as a casual conversation in an Internet chat room turned into a lifestyle for 27-year-old Karen (not her real name).

Karen met fellow chatter, Matt (not his real name), when she was chatting in an online group for Kuala Lumpur residents called, "KLights".

It was during one of their "chats" that he told her about his interest in joining a local swinging group.

"Matt was funny and interesting. But I was not interested in getting into a serious relationship and neither was he. So when he told me about joining a swinging group, I thought it might be fun to just observe what goes on.

"We went to the swingers meeting pretending to be husband and wife. We never intended to take part in any sexual activity."
The host of the swinging group gave the couple instructions on where and when the next meeting would be held.

"We were told to gather at a fancy restaurant in Kuala Lumpur. The agenda was to have dinner and then adjourn to the host's house.

"He had made reservations at the restaurant for 10 people. Matt and I told the host we were newly weds, looking for some adventure.

"At the dinner we chatted freely with other members of the group. We discussed everything, except sex.

"Everyone seemed a little nervous. The host told us that the dinner was also a form of vetting to make sure there was no rapist or 'strange' person wanting to join."

When dinner was over they adjourned to the host's house.

"The host lived in a mansion with many rooms. For the first couple of hours we all hung out by the pool, drinking wine and eating cheese. Then he handed us a piece of paper to list the people we would most want to have sex with, in order of most to least."

Karen said the host and his wife then paired the couples together according to their list. After that we were sent to individual rooms with the person of our choice.

"Although Matt and I were hesitant to have any physical contact with other people, we eventually warmed up to the other members. It didn't feel as awkward as I had thought it might be."

Matt and Karen continued swinging for a few more years before calling it quits.

"After a while, swinging got quite boring and monotonous. There were no emotions involved and the whole process felt very 'robotic'.

"We also started hearing rumours of members in the group who dropped out because they had got herpes. We didn't want to take the chance."

Karen will be getting married soon and her husband-to-be does not know about her swinging experience. She intends to keep that part of her life a secret.