The challenges of being a parent are now made easier with a support group to share ideas and to learn from one another. MEERA MURUGESAN writes.

Vimala, with Julia and her husband, Dr Michael Wilkinson.

Ritzzamoni with Ros Aqidah, husband Rosaimi Yusoff and son Mohd Afiq.

Yoong, who is mum to Tara, cites child safety as a primary concern of parents today.

BEING a parent today is far more challenging than it used to be. We hear this said all the time. New parents often point out that there is so much conflicting information on parenting out there that making even the simplest decision concerning their child can become a mammoth task.

But sometimes, the best resources for child rearing are not books but other parents.

Keeping this in mind, a group of concerned parents have come together to launch the ProActive parents Group or (PAG), an independent non-governmental organisation that provides a platform for Malaysian parents to share ideas and tips on parenting, to learn from one another and to have access to key topics involving children’s health, education, nutrition and safety.

PAG, which was officially launched on July 18, aims to introduce parents to the principles of creating happy and healthy families and all information and resources related to this will be disseminated via its online portal.
Enrolment into the organisation is free and open to all, from experienced parents and first-time parents to those planning to start a family and people who are interested in children’s issues.

“People often say parenting comes naturally and that’s true to an extent, but any parent will tell you that they could always use some kind of extra support,” said Vimala Siva Wilkinson, a PAG member and mother of two.

A television producer, Vimala has her hands full with her 21-month-old daughter Julia Shri Wilkinson and three-year-old son, Jay Roshen Wilkinson.

Vimala explained that being a parent today is more challenging given the myriad of issues that families face when dealing with their child’s educational, health, safety and nutritional needs.

From choosing the right pre-school and understanding childhood diseases, to learning how to cope with potty training or weaning a child off a pacifier, parents can learn a lot from others who have gone through similar experiences in today’s environment.

And it’s not always that simple to turn to grandparents for advice as certain problems that parents face today may not be things which they can relate to, explained Vimala.

“They may say things like, ‘we didn’t have that problem with you’ or ‘you guys were easy to raise’. It’s a different world today and raising children has become a real challenge.”

Vimala added that every little bit of information counts because each mother would have a different way of dealing with a particular problem and sharing those tips with others can really help.

When Julia was diagnosed with Hand Foot and Mouth Disease (HFMD) at seven months, Vimala was very distressed, given the shocking stories she had heard of children with the condition.

But her paediatrician assured her that Julia had contracted a less severe strain of the disease and she would recover with medication and after the disease had run its course.

“Usually, we only hear of the really bad cases, so parents panic when they are told their child has the condition. But when others who have been through it share their experiences, parents can understand the situation better and even take the right precautions,” she said.

PAG, which currently has 30 members, hopes to rope in as many more people as possible to form a strong, collective body that will also champion children’s causes in the country.

Given that many people today don’t live in extended families where grandparents are available for advice, being able to share with other parents becomes even more important, said Phillipa Yoong, a PAG member and mother of 20-month-old Tara Joy Bayly.

A first-time mother, Yoong, said that keeping children safe is one of the main concerns of parents today and being able to share information on how to do this can be crucial.

When she was growing up, Yoong enjoyed the freedom of playing outside the home and mingling in the neighbourhood, but these days, parents’ anxieties over their children’s safety cannot be dismissed.

Sharing safety tips or even advice on other more routine issues, such as where to source for affordable children’s clothing or how much television a child should watch, are all issues that parents today want to know about she explained.

“Parenting can get a little crazy sometimes and it helps to talk and share with people who truly understand just how complicated things can get,” she said.

Full-time mother Ritzzamoni Rosli, who has also signed up with PAG, agrees with Yoong.

The mother of four children aged seven to one said that besides parenting skills, sharing health information on vaccinations and diseases affecting children can end up saving lives.

Her youngest child, one-year-old Ros Aqidah, came down with pneumonia when she was three months old and it caught Ritzzamoni by surprise and led to a very anxious period in the family.

Other parents can play an important role in providing tips on caring for sick children or even how to spot warning signs where childhood diseases are concerned, she said.

“It’s good to be able to talk things over with another parent and learn something from their experience. If we can gain something beneficial from others and pass it on, why shouldn’t we do it?” she asked.

For more information on PAG or to sign up and become a member, visit the PAG website at www.PAGonline.org