ZIP THE LIPS: We may want to practice absolute freedom but, remember, chaos and confusion would follow.
SOME things should just remain in the closet. Coming out and parading one’s sexual preference is just not cool. If it is a skeleton, then there is a place where it should be. It ought not to be dragged out openly for public viewing.
It just baffles me why, of late, some segments of the society are just so open about their sexual pref erences.
Maybe they think society is now more understanding and open with regard to sexual issues previously considered taboo.
But again, a question which arises is how open should we be. Even then, surely we should not bare ourselves naked in public. There is certainly a limit to everything.
This brings us to the case of 28-year-old former medical student Ariff Alfian Rosli, 28, who just has no qualms about exposing his sexual identity. He got “married” to a guy in Ireland and their “wedding” pictures were splashed all over the Internet.
One thing that he has either forgotten or is not bothered with is that whatever he does with his life would have an impact and bearing on others. He is not alone as he surely has a family.
He has also left his family in deep trouble as Petronas, which gave him an educational loan, has issued a summons to his parents, demanding the repayment of about RM890,000.
Why cause humiliation and embarrassment to your parents?
Then there was Seksualiti Merdeka recently, which wanted to promote freedom of sexuality and identity for lesbians, gays, bisexuals and transgenders.
The organisers had no problems coming out in public and announcing to the whole world that there should be sexual freedom in the country.
It is true that we are living in a modern society but there should be limits to everything that we do in life. Don’t forget that we live in a multiracial society where culture and traditions are deeply entrenched.
Thus, why not just keep certain things in the closet?
Some might argue that by revealing his or her sexual preference, one is being true to himself or herself and is, thus, not being hypocritical.
But having said that, why not take a step further back?
We would then be able to see the consequences of our actions on loved ones, people who are part of our lives and our own families.
Can they accept the truth? Well, of course, there are those parents who have accepted their children for who they are. But again culture and religious sensitivities are is a big issue, especially in a our Malay Muslim-majority society.
Perhaps Ariff Alfian wanted to share his “excitement” as a newly- wed with the rest of the world. But is it necessary? Did he take a few minutes to consider how his mum’s heart would have broken into little pieces upon seeing the pictures of her son getting “married” to another man?
Or how his father would have to put up with stares and remarks from people in their community? Obviously, Ariff Alfian had little time to take all that into consideration.
To an extent, Malaysians are generally more accepting of those not like them these days. But again, one must never go over the limits. It is not wise to cross that boundary.
Is there a need for same-sex cou ples to go out holding hands or displaying their affection for each other in public?
People have largely been quite lenient and tolerant, but there is really no need to stretch their tolerance any further.
This is a very simple thing — if you feel that there are too many restrictions and Malaysian society cannot accept you for who you are, well, you should know what needs to be done.
That is what Seksualiti Merdeka organisers must realise. Freedom of expression has limits and if one were to practise absolute freedom, then chaos and confusion would rule.
Today, a section of society is ready to accept men who are dif ferent from most. Not just the homosexuals and transgenders but also metrosexuals who wear pink shirts to work and go for manicures, pedicures and facials, just like women.
There are also women who have no problems being best friends with homosexual men, who they tend to be able to share their per sonal problems with, including about on husbands or boyfriends, better. These women accept their friends for who they are and do not judge them.
That brings us to the question — why jeopardise society’s goodwill? Certain issues should be left where they belong — in the closet. Let it be that way.
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