NETFLIX'S Emily In Paris is all the rage right now. Everyone is watching it and talking about it, a television series about an American girl who moves to Paris for a job, and finds herself unhappily single, unable to fit in and ridiculed by Parisians for her non-Parisian ways.
She has a job at a public relations company and every day, she goes to the office dripping in couture and heels so high they could rival the Eiffel Tower.
She feels lonely and mopes for not being able to assimilate into Parisian culture. A few readers reached out to me to say the show reminded them of me and my time in Paris.
Intrigued, I went ahead and watched the show, and let's just get one thing straight — the only thing Emily and I have in common is that we both stayed in a rented room in an old Parisian building with a wonderful view of rooftops. That's it.
Unlike Emily and her couture wardrobe, I wore the same jacket and shoes day in and day out. While Emily is unhappily single, I had one of the best times of my life in Paris, and enjoyed being alone tremendously.
Emily tries so hard to appear Parisian, but I had no desire to be French — it is completely possible to be respectful of other people's culture without trying to be exactly like them.
She looks as thin as a model, while I ate at least two pastries and a half stick of butter daily, joyously.
She is ridiculed by Parisians, and well, although that never happened to me, a lady at a bakery did correct the way I pronounced "croissant" until I got it right, but I wasn't offended.
After all, if someone pronounces "nasi lemak" as "nasi limak", I would be compelled to correct her too.
THE RACE FACTOR
Perhaps one of the most crucial things I learnt from the show is how some of us are wired to think that we are superior. Something as simple as idolising others because of their racial heritage eventually embeds itself into us that we feel inferior.
The impact it has on one's self-esteem manifests in plenty of ways. Let's take an example closer to home — where some individuals are proud to be more "English", looking down at those who don't speak English well.
For some, intelligence is even measured by how you appear and which language you speak and we all know that's not true.
BE YOUR AUTHENTIC SELF
To be completely honest, this whole business of being proud with yourself, your background and your heritage is something that comes with age. The older you get, the more naturally these things come to you.
I definitely experienced an identity crisis when I was younger, having lived in different countries as a child and then as a college student.
I would like to think that television played a role in that as well, showcasing skewed racial casting in movies, and unflattering stereotypes of minorities, that shaped my thinking somewhat, leading to the perception that certain cultures are "cooler", or worse than mine.
Even books that I read were magical stories about people in other places, hardly about my own country or my heritage.
Trying to remove this mindset is an ongoing process and I admit that I am still working on it.
So, if Emily has taught me anything at all, it is that there is no need to be a Parisian in Paris. There is no need to be someone else. Why would you need to imitate, if you could be your authentic self?