Zaid Mohamad
As I was having lunch with my youngest son one day, an interesting topic popped up. He’s 15 and just like any teenager, was starting to be conscious about his body and looks. I’d seen this happen before with his three older siblings who today, are healthy and happy young adults. Now it’s his turn and he’s a little worried that he’s not as tall as some of his classmates.
Teenagers tend to rely on friends to see what to do next. Decisions are sometimes made emotionally. However, the good news is that while it might not be so easy to influence teenagers anymore, it doesn’t mean that parents should just give up. There are things that we can do to balance the situation and allow them some freedom.
Firstly, parents need to acknowledge and understand the emotional roller coaster that their teenager is probably experiencing. It’s probably due to the hormones being produced in their body for the first time. Parents need to be extra patient and understand that their teenager could also be quite confused with the changes.
This is what I had to do. My son is a little picky when it comes to food. He loves fruits but would try his best to avoid vegetables. Noting that he’s now more concerned about his growth, I saw it as a chance to influence him. I told him that he now has only about two years before his growth rate slows down. He was concerned about this and decided to seize the opportunity to do something about it. That was his window of opportunity.
LIFE’S TOO SHORT
The window of opportunity exists in all aspects of life. Parents too faced this window when nurturing their children. There’s not much time before they become independent. We should seize the moments before the window is shut permanently.
Tom Peters once said, “If a window of opportunity appears, don't pull down the shade.” Robin Sharma agreed. He said, “Each day, life will send you little windows of opportunity. Your destiny will ultimately be defined by how you respond to these windows of opportunity. Shrink from them and your life will be small; feel the fear and run to them anyway, and your life will be big. Life's just too short to play little.”
We need to be alert to the windows that open for us. Don’t let our busy schedule distract us from creating priceless moments with our children. Some will find happiness in chasing the latest gadgets and collecting a closet full of branded clothing. Maybe these things would make some of us happy but for how long? Studies have indicated that while chasing for material things are fun, the happiness doesn’t last very long. At the end of the day, windows of opportunity will not be opened forever. Let’s not miss them; we may live our life regretting the things not done.
Zaid Mohamad coaches and trains parents to experience happier homes and more productive workplaces. Reach him at zaidi@smartparents.com.my.