KUALA LUMPUR: Jihyo of popular K-Pop girl group Twice has been battling anxiety and depression for some time now.
According to Koreaboo, the 22-year-old idol revealed this in a lengthy letter dedicated to fans, which was posted on the nine-member music group’s official website.
Apparently, her fear of other people began to intensify early last year after rumours of her being involved in the now-disgraced fellow artiste Jung Joon Young’s sex-cam scandal circulated online.
“Even the time when I cried at the airport was because of the huge terror I felt towards the people who took photos of me, looked at me, and shouted at me. I felt so scared about how these people would think of me and what kind of mindset they had while looking at me,” she wrote about her condition.
Jihyo’s mental state was further exacerbated when news of her dating popular singer Daniel Kang broke a few months later. It resulted in her receiving medical attention for anxiety and depression.
She wrote: “Groundless rumours began to circulate and all the negative feelings like anxiety, depression and fear grew immensely. It became difficult for me to stand in front of people, say even a word, or to even perform.”
“My fears became too much to handle that I had to go to the hospital during our tour. I received consultation and medication but they didn’t help me much.”
Apparently, Jihyo’s worries had been slowly escalating since her debut in 2015 when she felt powerless in dealing with malicious comments by haters.
“Ever since I debuted, I’ve faced endless amounts of people talking bad about me, mocking me and cursing at me. I was so hurt by it and enraged, but I had work to do, I had my career to continue, and I had my fans, so I just did nothing about it.”
Her anxiety had become so severe that it even affected her recent performances and public appearances.
She wrote: “I cried for all throughout the three consecutive days of performances from my fear and I just wanted to hide. I performed at MAMA (Mnet Asian Music Awards) in that condition. I had to face a lot more people than normal, I had to talk and perform, and even breathing became difficult for me.”
The idol added that she was not asking for sympathy and that she wasn’t venting but had just wanted to explain things to the Twice fandom known as Once.
“There was never a time when I approached Onces with anything but my sincerity. There was never a time when Onces weren’t precious to me.”
“The reason why I sing, perform, and converse in front of Onces is because I truly, sincerely wish for my and Onces’ happiness. The reason why I continue in this career is because I have Onces who love me and embrace me warmly. I can persevere through many different things, so I hope Onces don’t have to look at things that can hurt them.”
Jihyo ended her letter by acknowledging that although there would certainly be more challenges down the road, she would strive to pull through.
“I’m sure that since I’m a celebrity and an idol, there will be many issues and rumours that arise for various reasons but I don’t want us to lose our happiness, our joy, and bright smiles to something else.”
“I’m sorry for making you worry, and thank you, Once.”