LETTERS: In our everyday lives, we start our activities with an intention. Muslims call it niat and it is the criterion of value for our daily activities and in our worship (amal).
Our daily prayers start with a niat and paying alms or zakat starts with a niat, to name a few. It may or may not be expressed out loud but it comes from the heart.
Despite having good intentions, being human, we are far from perfect. In one’s eagerness to encourage others to do good and forbid the bad, our intentions are often misconstrued.
One can come off as being self-righteous or having a “holier than thou” attitude. When we criticize a family member or a friend for his actions albeit with good intentions, we are often lashed at on the grounds that he is older and know better or because he holds a higher position.
As a result, our good intentions are wrongly perceived. The way we said it might have sounded like an attack on his character rather than his actions or that we showed no respect.
Having experienced this, I have come to realize that while good intentions are commendable, being able to convey it effectively is more important.
So, how does one communicate better, especially regarding moral values?
An important principle of dakwah in Islam, stated by the Prophet (PBUH), emphasises the necessity of dakwah with wisdom (hikmah).
Clearly, communication and dakwah are both related to how people convey a message or idea to others.
During this trying time in this MCO period, we see many good intentions end up as biased perceptions. Could it be due to the lack of wisdom or hikmah on both sides?
Research into the science of wisdom by psychiatrist Dilip Jeste found that wisdom has six components: a general knowledge of life and good judgement in social situations; control over your emotions; pro-social behaviours like empathy; compassion altruism and a sense of fairness; insight into oneself and one’s action; value relativism and decisiveness.
It is common belief that wisdom cannot be taught but rather gained.
Quoting Confucius, “By three methods we may learn wisdom; first by reflection, which is noblest; second, by imitation, which is easiest; and third by experience, which is the bitterest”.
The first method can justify why we may witness wisdom amongst the young. Those who make it a practice to reflect are those who will possibly be given the hikmah.
Gaining wisdom by the second method, imitation, is to follow the footsteps of a wise person.
With Muslims, this would be the prophet (PBUH) and other messengers and to understand the contents of the Quran, the Book of Wisdom.
The third method could justify why the old becomes wiser using the insights and perspectives from their life’s experience to understand and help others.
So to gain true wisdom is to seek it philosophically. After all, philosophy literally means the love of wisdom.
To possess the six scientific components of wisdom is to be able to understand the world and society and to live harmoniously in a multicultural and multi-religious community.
Prof Datin Dr Rohaya Ahmad
Faculty of Applied Sciences Universiti Teknologi MARA