KUALA LUMPUR: A woman from Johor took the unprecedented step of undergoing the ‘bersanding’ ceremony alone after her husband, a fireman, was unable to get leave to attend their own wedding.
Badriyah Amirullah, 26, was garbed in the full ‘pengantin’ outfit as the ‘bersanding’ ceremony took place in Teluk Intan, last Sunday.
Recalling the events which led up to the incident, Badriyah said she and her husband, Mohamad Syaiful Izwan Mohamad Shah, both 26, had known each other for a year before they tied the knot on November 18 last year.
The wedding was held at the bride’s family home in Kampung Melayu Majidee, Johor. The reception for the groom’s family was scheduled to be held four months later in order to accommodate the groom’s sizeable family, who are in Terengganu, Kedah and Perak.
She said she was overjoyed when she learnt that her husband, who is undergoing training to become a fireman with the Terengganu Fire and Rescue Department, had his leave approved for their wedding.
“He was given three days leave and was supposed to return to duty on Monday (March 19).
“So we thought there were no more problems. We were excited at the prospect of having the ‘bersanding’ for the second time. But as it turns out, we can only plan, God decides,” she said.
It was only later that they learnt that her husband would not be given leave after all.
Badriyah, who is a safety assistant at a Johor Bahru factory, said her husband was scheduled to complete his training in July before being assigned to a fire department.
She said, when she learnt that her husband would not be able to attend the ‘bersanding’ ceremony, she almost broke down tears in front of her in-laws.
“I’m thankful to my in-laws who consoled me and calmed me down. They urged me to stay strong and just relax, seeing that all the wedding preparations were already in place.
“I don’t think I could have gone through it were it not for them,” she said.
As the days led up to the bersanding, Badriyah said she did not want to wear the ‘baju pengantin’ as she felt it would be awkward.
“However, my husband said it would be better if I did. ‘You are still a bride’, he said, and that we would have many family members in attendance,” she said.
She said, on the day of the ‘bersanding’, the wedding guests at the Mini Arena Square, Chenderong Balai, turned as she arrived, and had a puzzled look on their faces as if they were wondering where the groom was.
Fortunately, the wedding emcee quickly announced that Syaiful would not be able to make it, which then drew relieved sighs from the guests.
“I braved myself to walk in front of the guests and made my way to the main table. Only God knows what I felt at the time.
“Of course I was embarrassed. Who wouldn’t be, if their husband wasn’t by their side on the day of their ‘bersanding’. But I knew that as the family’s first daughter-in-law, I had to brave myself and make it to the end of the ceremony,” she said.
Meanwhile, Badriyah said she and her family hoped that no one will blame the Fire and Rescue Department for not granting her husband’s leave application. She is instead viewing it positively.
She said she accepts with an open heart the challenges that comes with being the wife of a fireman.
“Every cloud has a silver lining. My family and I are just grateful that he was blessed with the opportunity to become a fireman.
“I see this all as preparation for the future, as there may be plenty more challenges in store.
“But whatever it is, the experience (of ‘bersanding’ alone) is something I probably won’t forget anytime soon.”